Thursday, April 23, 2009

City bloggin' - here I come!

So yesterday I was “called out” by my friend* MIke. He was mentioning that our city, Fresno, doesn’t have enough female bloggers. After *AHEM* very politely mentioning that I am indeed female and blog it up quite often, he clarified that I write, but I don’t write about where I live. I, of course, have failed in mentioning my lovely town of residence due to an intense fear of identity theft** but that’s okay, I’ll try anything to make people like me. Plus, I’m trying not go into a tailspin of angst that he questioned my gender and be reasonable that he probably just wants to know about all the AWESOME things I do in this lovely little town.

So whatdaya think folks? Should i take this blog on the road? Dare I actually leave my house and see what mischief I can get into at the farmers market? LIve blog the panic that ensues at Petsmart when my dog (a nervous crapper) decides to take the only dump of his life, in the middle isle, right in front of the “try our new brand of dog food” display? There was also that one time where I nearly met my perilous end at Woodward Park when I had a showdown with an evil cannibal goose! How about I amuse you with my tale of woe from the TOO FAST checkout lady at the Vons at Cedar/Shepard who’s pin code to log into her cash register is NO SHORTER than 100 digits. I like to pretend she’s memorized Pi (π)...

3.1415926535897932384626433832795028841971693993
751058209749445923078164062862089986280348253421
170679821480865132823066470938446095505822317253
594081284811174502841027019385211055596446229489
549303819644288109756659334461284756482337867831
652712019091456485669234603486104543266482133936
072602491412737245870066063155881748815209209628
292540917153643678925903600113305305488204665213
841469519415116094330572703657595919530921861173
819326117931051185480744623799627495673518857527
248912279381830119491298336733624406566430860213
949463952247371907021798609437027705392171762931
767523846748184676694051320005681271452635608277
857713427577896091736371787214684409012249534301
465495853710507922796892589235420199561121290219
608640344181598136297747713099605187072113499999
983729780499510597317328160963185950244594553469
083026425223082533446850352619311881710100031378
387528865875332083814206171776691473035982534904
287554687311595628638823537875937519577818577805
321712268066130019278766111959092164201989 (It goes on)

That’s a long ass number to which her register cannot process quickly - okay I got sidetracked and this is quite the traumatic story...

Plus, I fear there is representation “South of Sunnyside” and WAAY too many Tower loving elitists straight South, but who’s going to represent the NORTH SIDE? Us vain, shopoholic, trophy wives need to have a voice, don’t we? Well, not that I’m married, but I have manicure and tanning plans which are sure to snag me a man!

City bloggin’ here I come!




*I say friend lightly as we wouldn’t recognize each other on the streets. Well one look at my blog and he might recognize ME, but only because I’ve got pictures of myself everywhere.

** Yes, I know this doesn’t make any sense since my main identity -MY LIKENESS- is plastered all over the place. Please don’t steal me! Actually, in preparing for my inevitable abduction I’ve systematically taken pictures of myself in every possible pose and hair color like those missing children things where they computer analyze bone structure and determine what you would look like in 20 years or if you were trying to disguise yourself. HA FOOLED YOU! Now you know. Oh wait, or is it fooled me because I was the one trying to hide. Damn it!

7 comments:

Conlan April 23, 2009 at 11:07 AM  

That's good news. If you don't want to city blog on your own blog, I'll publish your stuff over at FMB. If you want. Only if you want.

bradley April 23, 2009 at 12:16 PM  

Conlan, she's a big girl and can host her own blog. LOL.

Nice first post of your newly re-imagined blog focus. i'm still laughing at the vons checker login thing. i too have marvelled at the skill of such checkers.

Conlan April 23, 2009 at 12:29 PM  

I didn't mean to offend anyone's delicate sensibilities. I just meant, if you didn't want to change the focus of your blog. It's always nice to have options. Unless the options are, like, getting stabbed by a rabid monkey or getting rabid by a stabbed monkey.

Mike Oz April 23, 2009 at 12:33 PM  

"... who’s going to represent the NORTH SIDE? Us vain, shopoholic, trophy wives need to have a voice, don’t we?"

Exactly.

As I told you, I dig your style and your humor, so I'm glad you're jumping aboard the city bloggin' train.

And look at Conlan, trying to get himself a blogopoly.

Conlan April 23, 2009 at 12:35 PM  

Hey, if north side blogging belongs anywhere, it's Fresno Magazine!

Mike Oz April 23, 2009 at 12:40 PM  

Coming soon:
Blogger Olympics 2.5: The Civil War.

brodiemash April 23, 2009 at 4:39 PM  

See what you started, Mike Oz?! That's like two fires you've sparked this week: female bloggers & Fresno Promo video.

Although I dig the Mountain Dew & Chocodile posts, look forward to seeing this new direction.

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