Monday, July 20, 2009

Tips to help civilize the general public...

Yeah, some of you are in dire straights. I mean, I think you all know I could wax poetic bitch and moan for hours on end about how you all are fucking up the minute details of my serenity.

Let me just give you the smallest of pointers. Your roommates/parents/spouse/house cleaner can thank me later.

Kitchen Sink Rules
1) PLEASE, do NOT fill both basins with your garbage. For the love of god, leave the garbage disposal side empty so the one's of us who want to use the sink still have a free and clear side to work with.

2) PLEASE, rinse out or rinse off your plate/bowl before you walk away. I could go on an on about how ridiculous it is that you feel entitled to just leave your stuff for someone else to clean up in the first place, but should you feel completely comfortable burdening the others in your work place or household with your laziness and refuse - AT LEAST have the decency to rinse. Dropping your napkin in your half eaten bowl of minestrone and splashing some water on it for good measure is about the most disrespectful offensive load of bullshit I've ever seen. YOU DIDN'T WANT TO WASH IT IN THE FIRST PLACE, but now I have to put my hands in your last digestive "experience" to clean up your mess.



Mintzworks July 22, 2009 at 1:27 PM  

tips to civilize the 'general public?'

You mean 'to straighten out my effing roomies!'

Hey, if you don't share your expectations, they can't be met, right?

My current roomie told me one thing before she moved in - "I don't do dishes."

And neither do I, really. Thank goodness she has a boyfriend, cuz I don't want to admit to how many times I've thrown out old dishes because they were beyond washing.

But hey, I love to vacuum! That's worth something, right?

oneheavenlyheart July 23, 2009 at 4:37 PM  

Well, I'm not talking about my roommates - Just FYI.

I would burn my house down before I would live like that - like a caveman. UGH.

Only way someone earns points with me is if they are willing to mop. I don't mop. Makes me cry every time.

Mintzworks July 25, 2009 at 2:25 PM  

For you, I'll mop.

Actually, I don't mind mopping.

Here's my terrible secret: I seem to have no problem cleaning my best friend's house - the one with the 4 kids. I even do dishes without blinking too much.

But to do that for my own place is like lifting the last, heaviest stone in the strongman competition...just. can't. do it.

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