Envious Cravings...

Well, I'm sure that title sounds a lot sexier than what I'm actually talking about.

I've essentially typed and then deleted two very long blogs. Actually, though, I love re-reading my blogs because I'm fascinated with the perfect capturing of a moment in time, a moment in my head... and these things even I didn't want to re-read so they had to go bye-bye! They were too long winded and detailed with an overbearing sad desperation. Who needs that!?

Somehow, though, when the right subject strikes me, I HAVE to write about it. I wrestled with telling you stories, with analogies, with timelines, with stories insides stories, yet it wasn't until I laid here in bed that the words came to me.

"I am envious of simplicity, but I crave complexity."

Yup, that's it. Put one more notch in my "contradiction" headboard will ya? I wanted to regale you with information about my deepest thoughts and innerworkings. I had a whole paragraph dedicated to the "Photosynthesis of Sorrow." There were quotes from books and feelings and more, but everything sort of boiled down into that one sentence.

Sometimes I think it’s hard to be me.

*PS - I don't know why this post required a picture of me, but I found the top at Nordstrom Rack this weekend and I think it's super cute, so whatever...