For the girl who has everything...

Yeah, that's not true. I don't have much actually. People say it's hard to buy for me because I'm so specific. Most of my friends just ask me for a list. How do they know I LOVE making lists and keep a running one of "things to buy" ??? HA HA

Actually, I was just thinking about my last post where I said iTunes gift cards and kitchen goodies are a surefire win.  (I think "SureFire" is my word of the week - I've used it like 20 times now... ha!)

However, you know what I love? As in LOVE LOVE? PENS! I may have a slight thing about gel pens, specifically with glitter in them, but that's sort of a "me" thing. These are similar to the ones I buy and use at work to everyone's chagrin:

You know what though? I've never received a pen as a gift that I can recall. :( I think now I'm ready for a real pen. An expensive pen. A NICE PEN. My friend has this Paul Smith roller ball pen. It's like the best pen ever.

I WANT A COOL NICE EXPENSIVE KEEPER PEN!

So how old does this make me? 50? 60?

I received an iTunes gift card for Christmas. I get them from time to time and I just keep the credits online so I can buy what I want (music/iPhone apps/etc) whenever the mood hits me. (Anything Apple or for the kitchen is a surefire way to win my heart BTW)

So what hits me yesterday? MUSIC - I want a new CD. And what do I wind up buying? The Best of Sade, of course. I guess she has a new album coming out and I can't wait for that, but OMG I AM MY MOTHER!!  She was always rockin' Sade. That and DeBarge. Enough for me to exclaim when I was 5 that I HATED music and that I would NEVER own a radio! (Pretty sure my mom played RECORDS!!! and there was no such thing as a CD yet so radio was where it was at maaan... HA HA)

I'm LOVING listening to my new CD now, but there's a little voice inside telling me this is, in fact, the final sign of the times. Forget all those earthquakes in one place after another - god is speaking to us all. Be forewarned!

Oh yeah, and I made and ate a really good sandwich the other day. MMMM

I think I want a divorce - No No, It's not you, it's me.

Yeah, I'm ready to file papers with you, Borders. I love you, but I'm just not IN love with you. Every time I visit I leave empty handed. You never have what I'm looking for.  I can never find a person to help me and usually have to use the self help computer, but it's not so helpful.

You are more conveniently located, I have coupons and your free rewards card, and I like the way your store is laid out, but I've found someone better.

Barnes & Noble just knows how to treat a lady. I go to the counter and they answer me immediately and even go get my books and bring them back to me. Thank you B&N as I am now a happy and satisfied customer and the excited owner of my new book, Eating Animals.

I can't wait to read this.

An experiment in vanity...

There is so much in the media about celebrities and their appearances. People are lambasting Heidi Montag for getting plastic surgery. Granted, I think she's not so smart and was pretty enough already, but actually I think she looks fabulous now.

Then there was the whole revolt against Demi Moore for possibly photoshopping herself to look better. What, pray tell, is so wrong with a 40+ year old women who will be appearing on a magazine cover looking her best?? Do you want her up there with no makeup??

Oprah just made a crack about the cover of her most recent magazine and how she looked at it while she was actually at the breakfast table and it made her laugh because she didn't look ANYTHING like that.

I don't know. It's just started to bother me. Maybe there is something wrong with me, but I like those magazines. I like perfection. I expect perfection. I don't know. I was raised that you should always put your best foot forward. I take the time to put make up on. I get my hair done religiously. I like to wear decent clothes. And, TRUST ME, finding good clothes that fit my body is laborious and hard.

So I thought to myself - are the pictures online representative of me in real life? I don't know! Do I put forward the REAL me or a puffed and fluffed up version of me? I don't know!

I can tell you this much though, I take a lot of pictures! I fiddle with finding the right light and getting a good angle and cropping out the weird stuff and hey, if you own photoshop you better use it right?!?!

So, I said it last post and I'll say it again this post - FULL DISCLOSURE! I got nothing to hide so here's me, in the raw. Not so pretty now, eh?

What would you do if photographers were following you at every moment? Seeing even that middle one makes me want to have at least 18 different surgeries and that's what I friggen look like every day!

Which would YOU want to on a magazine cover? Ummm, PhotoShop just became my new BFF. Of course, I purposely didn't smile and that's not even a good picture with good lighting. In fact, that was straight window sunlight which is very unflattering... but anyways.

It was just a little experiment. What are your thoughts? What would you do?

Wha? Where have I been?

I don't know. I've been busy! Here I set all these New Years resolutions which take a lot of time. Can you ever forgive me?

My mind has been working though. I have all these things I want to say, but they deserve more than half ass paragraphs.

#3 on my resolutions was to read 2 books.

I have my 2 books all picked out. I'm 1/2 way through the 1st one.  Change your thoughts, change your life - Living the wisdom of the Tao by Wayne Dyer. WOW I Love this book. Don't you remember me quoting the 29th Verse of the Tao every few months. Little known fact maybe...? I read that verse every day. EVERY DAY.

My 2nd book? I haven't bought it yet, but I'm so excited to renew my passion for healthy eating and compassionate eating. I've decided my next purchase will be Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer. Every person I encounter asks me WHY? I have this long complicated answer but secretly I roll the windows down when I drive past Famous Dave's. I may catch a morsel of bacon or pepperoni juice in a shared meal and I savor it. I dream about sleeping in and eating an entire bed of chicken strips and then I wake up and say WHY AM I DOING THIS? I'm wrapping up my 7th year of vegetarianism right now and I need to put some energy into this path I'm on and make sure it's still the right one for me.

Guess that's kinda heavy, right? Well, I told you I've been busy! I'll keep you posted :)

I'm still going to the gym, but I also like to not deny myself so here's a picture of me eating a toffee bar, a lemon bar, and a Mtn Dew for lunch last week. My stomach did hurt, but that's okay! Oh yeah, I texted this pic to my trainer too in case you were curious! Full disclosure!

Good Ole Twenty-Ten

I guess I'm sort of a symbolic person. I do like to do new years resolutions. I reflect on the past year and try to get myself in the right mindset for the upcoming year.

Most people say they gave up on setting them because they never keep them. Well, I'm not too worried about that as half of these I started before 2010, but I want to post them here to help keep me accountable to them.

My resolutions for 2010 are:

1) Have 75% lung capacity by June (Last checkup was 53%)
2) Be in good shape by July (So I can wear a really inappropriate bikini!)
3) Read 2 books (Books towards my personal betterment)
4) Practice stillness - think before you talk & act
5) Be kinder to my mom (I've been a little rough on her - she's a good mom)
6) Watch less TV
7) Go to bed earlier and be to work on time

Nothing too crazy or impossible like giving up soda or anything like that. Just need to be steady eddy about going to the gym and with the TV off I'll be able to read more and go to be earlier and hopefully not be so tired and grumpy so I can be nicer to the good ole mom.