Thursday, March 29, 2007

Ever notice...?

Ever notice how things move in slower motion than a John Woo film?
(Yeah, thats right, I said it. You know Mission Impossible II was only a 20 minute movie in slow motion dragged out to 2 hours)

I mean, I swear to god - I’m just trying to drive from Joann’s Fabrics to my house. That’s less than 4 miles I’m sure! SLOW MOTION people... The traffic lights, the acceleration, the lane changes.... Tom Cruise could have done 3 or 4 spinning kicks AND a motorcycle jump in John Woo land before these people could figure out which one was the gas pedal. Ok, truth be told I’m really enjoying this segment of my blog. Crackin myself up I tell ya!

Ever notice something about yourself that you already knew, but then it hits you RIGHT between the eyes? Like I always say I’m an emotional eater. Listen people... I AM AN EMOTIONAL EATER! I just got it today. I was sitting there at work and things got really hectic for a second - phone calls, people paging me, computers breaking, a phone call from my mother... ALL AT ONCE. Guess who blurts out “I’m STARVING!” I wasn’t really hungry, but I had this unbelievable urge to eat. WILD...

Ever notice that you’ve packed your life so full of activities that you never have a moment to rest? I know some of you feel me on this one. Every once in a while I have a bit of an emotional breakdown. When do things slow down? When can I get ahead? How do I decide which thing to let go when I love every single thing I’m doing right now? I don’t know if I could live with myself if I accepted defeat and just went back to being ordinary. I think that’s my realization... I don’t want to be normal, I want super powers. I want to be perfect. I want to be a go to person for EVERYTHING. I want to be super woman. People have started to tell me I’m looking tired. Asking me if I’m “ok” in that weird way where they are really telling you the stress is written all over your face. I keep thinking, no I just need to get better, faster, smarter, more focused, more organized and then I can have it all. Unfortunately, that just brings more responsibility my way.

I know I have a tendency to hoard things... to do them myself so I know they will be done right. Well, so so sadly, I looked at my “to do” list and realized there is nothing left to delegate. It’s 16 things (all work, not even in my personal life) and it’s all ME baby. You know, those things that would take you longer to teach someone than to do yourself. Sigh. Can someone please come over and take my dog for a walk? Take my dry cleaning? Clean my house? Put gas in my car? I need a personal assistant I think. Any takers? no....? :( :( oh... :(

Ever notice that there is a crisis going on with the female gender? Sure girls can get fake nails and do their hair perfectly and shop all day and night... But can they arrange flowers in a vase? Can they throw a dinner party? Can they cook? Are they clever? I’m not just talking about women who stay at home and have all day to refine their craftiness. I work... TRUST ME. But it’s like talking to a brick wall sometimes when it comes to coming up with an original thought. I want to be A WOMAN. Confident and strong, but still cute.. still a compliment to any environment.

Ever notice that you’ve written WAY too much and you have stuff to do? I have to go be crafty now and make a Miss America sash that says “Birthday Boy 2007” on it for this guy at work tomorrow because it’s his birthday and that’s what I do. Have a nice night.


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